All roads lead to Overton - 40 days to go

If in 1805, Admiral Lord Nelson had used a Garmin cycle computer to guide him to Portsmouth for the start of his last, fateful voyage on board HMS Victory; I think there is little doubt we’d all be speaking French today.


We attempted to kill two birds with one stone on this weekend’s training ride. Firstly we thought we’d go down to Portsmouth to see what the ride to the ferry might be like and secondly we though we’d try some gentle satellite navigation by allowing Jeremy’s Garmin cycle computer to lead the way.

A route from Streatley to Portsmouth of 63 miles was duly loaded into the device. After 75 miles and with only the slightest hint of schadenfreude on Graham’s part, we were still exploring previously uncharted areas of Hampshire countryside. Try as we might to persuade the little gadget to take us to Portsmouth, it seemed fascinated by a place called Overton and attempted to take us back there on three of four separate occasions.

The Garmin is supposed to give a little ‘ping’ to tell you that your turning’s coming up only in our case, we got a little ‘ping’ to tell us we’d just missed it. We discovered that only by travelling at less than 10 mph would it ‘Ping’ in time to be vaguely useful - which conveniently enough, provides this week’s excuse for a our continually decreasing average speed on these rides; a sedentary 15.8 mph for this outing. With Jeremy mumbling something about incompatible file formats, it was with considerable relief that Chris and I once again placed our trust in Graham’s homing pigeon instincts, which have served us so well over the past few years.

After cycling 88 miles we eventually got to Portsmouth for an extremely civilised lunch of pie and mash in a pub by the Historic Dockyard. For the return journey we followed the country lanes that the Garmin should have lead us down on the way. A lovely ride on a beautiful April afternoon through Hambledon, Corhampton, Farringdon, Basingstoke, Aldermarston and home. 151 miles and back by six in time to go out for a Chinese with Manda and the kids.

Mid week training continued apace with Chris getting a couple of 25 mile rides and some running in, Graham trying an 80 mile commute to work for the first time this year and Jeremy and I following our usual regime which included another trip to Reading Velodrome on Tuesday evening.

The route to Venice is more or less settled now with the only remaining question being whether we attempt the famous Stelvio pass on day 6. There are now two schools of thought; Chris and I who being in our forties, believe that you’re only young once and that climbing over a 9,000 foot pass after having peddled nearly 900 miles is an eminently sensible idea, Graham and Jeremy on the other hand think we should go with a perfectly acceptable alternative which is 30 miles shorter and involves about 3000 feet less climbing. Whilst I’m not entirely clear about the reasons for their reluctance, I’m convinced that Jeremy’s concern relates to a fear of finding himself heading back to Overton should he be forced to rely on his ##~&*!@!! Garmin. At this stage, I think we’ll plan both a Stelvio and non-Stelvio route and see how the mood takes us when we get there.

This week will see us booking hotels and sorting out racks, bags and carriers for the bikes. Keep you posted!

Planning begins in earnest with 46 days to go

It's funny how we become so accustomed to certain aspects of our environment that we simply don't notice them anymore. As we set out last Sunday morning through the Oxfordshire countryside, there was an eerie unreality about the perfect, gin clear blue sky and the uninterrupted natural harmony of the dawn chorus. The absence due to an Icelandic ash cloud, of any aircraft, their noise and their tell-tail vapour trails, was having an unexpectedly profound effect on our world.

Sunday’s ride saw the four of us reunited for the first time in a few weeks. With holidays behind us and travel commitments unusually benign, we thought we should put a good ride in. Leaving Streatley at 06:00 we headed off to Cheltenham for breakfast via Farringdon and Lechlade, the return journey taking us through Cirencester and Fairford. A most enjoyable 125 miles in glorious sunshine all be it at a rather stately average of 16.4 mph, this due in no small part to the after effects of a couple of rather good parties in the village on Saturday Night.

This week saw us start to get to grips with maps, compasses, and an excellent website called Bike Route Toaster as we realised that if we don’t agree the route, it’ll be too late to book any decent hotels. Youth Hostels and formule 1 hotels are out - we’ve all had the misfortune to try them.

Our plan is to do the trip unsupported and we’ll be carrying only absolute essentials; tee shirt, shorts, tools, spares, phones and of course the essential chamois cream (don’t ask). We need to have our hotels booked not only to ensure that we have a bed for the night but also so we can send them Red-Cross parcels full of essentials for the following day’s ride, you can imagine the sort of thing, protein drink powder, carbohydrate gels, underpants etc. We did a similar thing on our last expedition; Graham weighed various powders out into small plastic bags before wrapping them up and sending them off to the various hotels. I'm sure you can see where this is going…. The package received at one hotel in Scotland had split and whilst we didn’t actually have the Drug Squad awaiting our arrival, eloquent and persuasive explanations were required to preserve our liberty.

We haven’t been entirely idle and have in fact booked the start and finish points for the trip. We’ll be cycling down to Portsmouth after work on Friday 4th June and taking the overnight ferry to Caen. All being well, we’ll spend the following Friday and Saturday nights at the Hotel Al Sole in Venice before flying home on the Sunday.

The challenge this week has been to sort out the bit in the middle and we’re now well on the way. Whilst we have yet to agree the finer points, the broad plan at this stage is:

Day 1 Caen to Sonchamp 133 miles
Day 2 Sonchamp - Laignes 147 miles
Day 3 Laignes - Belfort 146 miles
Day 4 Belfort - Weesen 128 miles (Into Switzerland)
Day 5 Weesen - Zernez 67 miles (big hills)
Day 6 Zernez - Margreid an der Weinstraße 104 miles (Into Italy and more big hills)
Day 7 Margeid - Venice 131 miles

 According to one of Jeremy’s gadgets, this route requires us to climb a total of 38,368 feet or exactly 9,339 feet more than the height of Mount Everest – is this possible for four men of a certain age?

Whilst others concern themselves with minimising impossible distances and ludicrous climbs, I have become aware of another, altogether more insidious problem. Day 3 will see us cycling through what is unquestionably the greatest wine growing region in the world; I recall with a certain unease the devastation caused by coming within drinking distance of the Clynelish distillery as we cycled through Scotland, The idea of completing 143 miles in one day through Burgundy will require more self control than I for one could possibly muster.

Week beginning Monday 5th April. 54 days to go

So once again, training was all a bit disjointed this week. Jeremy got back from the Canaries suffering the consequences of having eaten one of those lukewarm tuna ciabattas that seem standard fare at airports these days. His ‘cycling camp’ appears to have been a success, He reports that the mountain training has given him legs like ‘tree trunks’ and that breathtaking scenery (see photo) gave him the strength to keep up with the peloton of finely honed German athletes.

Chris has gone skiing this week with his shiny new bike (and his family). We are getting alarming texts suggesting that he’s doing 40 mile Alpine rides by way of après ski. Still, that’s Chris.

Graham has had a somewhat less athletic week. The trouble with running your own Garden maintenance business is that at this time of year things suddenly start to grow and strangely, this means they need to be ‘maintained’. It would appear that Graham’s meticulously crafted planning algorithms which are supposed to effortlessly direct the right white van, to the right place, at the right time - had the decimal point in the wrong place. The result was confusion, shouting, interesting gesticulations, and only time for a couple of hours on the Turbo.

As for me, now the days are getting longer, I find the 29 mile commute into the office in Maidenhead quite achievable and I managed this a couple of times in the week racking up 116 miles in the process. I’m afraid I can’t give you an average speed as my bike computer received a good wash at 40 degrees on a short spin.

So with Chris skiing and Jeremy still suffering the after affects of his Ciabatta, this Sunday’s cycle was again just Graham and I. A relatively short ride; 70 miles via Thame, Bicester and Wheatley. It was a lovely morning, lots of cyclists out. We came up on one pair of guys all nicely attired in those excellent Foska ‘London Pride’ beer road jerseys. “Do you think we can take them?” asks Graham. We go for it and fly past, desperately trying to make an impressive get away. We thought we were clear however as we sweated up a serious hill coming out of Wheatly, the London Priders glided serenely past us and just to make the point, started chatting to us on the steepest part of the incline about how they were training for the Etape. All in all a good ride, we left Streatley at 06:00 back just after 10:00 averaging a shade over 17 mph, the early finish earning innumerable smarty points at home.

Easter Weekend Training

With a couple of months to go, we have all got to a level where we can ride 130 miles comfortably at about 15 mph. Our challenge now is to ensure we can do this kind of distance for seven days consecutively and at a slightly higher speed. It looks like we can all get fit enough and endurance will be the key so from here on in, its miles in the saddle that will count.

It wasn’t a particularly well coordinated training regime this weekend. Jeremy has gone off to the Canary Islands and according to e-mails is enjoying rather too much sunshine and sangria although he does confess to having hired a bike and hooking up with cycle training camp on Grand Canaria comprising mostly German athletes half his age, so God only knows what state he’ll be in when he gets back. With Chris also out of the picture, Good Friday saw Graham and I heading off to Dorset. I had to go and see the Mother-in-Law, Graham consented to join me for part of the ride. The first couple of hours were fine as we took a route past Hungerford and headed towards Salisbury but then the temperature dropped and the heavens opened. Life became miserable, wet and cold. We received a shower every time a car passed and to add injury to insult, both of us rode into a huge pot hole concealed by a torrent of water and were catapulted off our bikes into a crowd of rather startled Salisbury pedestrians. Saturated, battered, bruised we dripped into a Costa coffee for cake, hot chocolate and frantic phone calls to come and be rescued. Not a great inaugural ride for the new bike which thankfully came out of it rather better than I!

As a rule we tend to try and get our cycling in early so it doesn’t impinge too much on family life so on Saturday and Sunday mornings we were joined by Chris and added to Friday’s miserable 60 miler with a couple of our regular 50 mile training rides to Stokenchurch and back. Much better weather and better speed, we averaged 15mph to Salisbury but improved to 16.9 and 17.3 respectively on the two Stokenchurch rides. A trip to Northampton for me and to Kent for Chris on Monday means that we’ve all covered between 150 and 200 miles this week. About right with a couple of months to go.

Background to this adventure

In 2007 two friends and I all suffering from a mid-life crisis in just the same way, took it upon ourselves to cycle from Land’s End to John O’Groats in seven days. Whilst this trip proved both successful and memorable on many levels; the ride through Glencoe one misty May morning being particularly unforgettable, it was a disappointment in one important respect - it failed utterly in curing the mid-life crisis. In fact it made it rather worse, rekindling an enthusiasm for bicycles none of us had experienced since we were ten years old.

In spite of wise council from our wives who reminded us that when the world wearies and society ceases to satisfy “there is always gardening”, here we are three years later about to do it all over again, only this time we’re being a little more ambitious. The plan is to ride from Streatley-on-Thames, a sleepy village nestling under the Berkshire Downs to Venice. Not only is the journey some 150 miles further than ‘LEJOG’ at a little over 1000 miles, but of course there is the small matter of the Alps and as last time, all has to be done in the 7 days that we’ve been allowed out for (relatively) good behaviour.

For this trip the team has grown from three to four. There’s myself, Sam, a sometime marathon runner and management consultant with a perverse attraction for working in African military dictatorships. There’s Chris, one of nature’s natural accountants, what ever he may say to the contrary. Chris is sickeningly athletic, running the 79 mile Jurassic Coast Challenge last year because no one would go with him on “a big bike ride”. Graham who since our last expedition has acquired a garden maintenance business and is now the proud owner of no less than five white vans and finally the newcomer Jeremy, a frightful grown up with an enormous software company who believes that there’ll always be a gadget available to help answer even the most profound questions of life, the universe and cycling.

What follows is a record of our training and hopefully of the ride itself – planned to start on Friday 4th June 2010. I thought I might start this blog today not only because rather appropriately it’s April fools day, but also because it’s been something of a seminal week in our preparations as myself and Chris have taken possession of our new bikes, a Ridley Orion and a Basso Laguna respectively, joining Graham’s Kuota Kebel and Jeremy’s Lynksey - for those interested in such things.